we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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