even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Randomize