Where did you get a picture of my penis
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Randomize
