it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Randomize
