There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
