Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
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