Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
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