I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
she smelled like a LAN party
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
