By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
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