didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
y did u give ur computer a hand job?
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
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