i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
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