yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
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