she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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