is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
