everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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