If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
