The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
