Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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