Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Randomize
