Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
