Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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