Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
you have to choose: penises or morals?
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
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