she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize