the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
How's work?
Spinning.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Randomize
