Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize