I want to stick my p in your. b.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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