i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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