Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
third nipple confirmed
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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