i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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