we're blogging at a bar
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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