Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Randomize
