my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
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