i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Randomize
