Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Randomize
