Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
