Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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