idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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