That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I'm getting married
To pizza
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
