she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Hippo gnu deer
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize