I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
