weddingsv make me drug and hornr
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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