I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Randomize