im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Randomize