when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
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