Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
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I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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