Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
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Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
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