I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Randomize