he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
