They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
