Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Sorry my hands just texted you
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat