The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
