Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
