Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
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