Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
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