i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Randomize
